When I first took Eva back into my care she got sick. Really sick. The night before I was to pick her up from her foster parents’ house, I got a call at 1am saying she was in the ER having trouble breathing.
I remember asking, “seriously?” To which her foster mum responded, “yes, seriously”. As if someone would joke about that.
I flew with Eva to Starship hospital where we spent the next two weeks. It was the worst and best initiation into being Eva’s full time carer again. It was stressful and worrying and I cried a lot of tears wondering if she would pull through it, but it also meant we had two weeks to ourselves to reconnect. It gave me a scare and reassured me that there was no where else I wanted to be, but beside her. Whatever happened.
Not all the memories from that hospital stay are hard. In fact, some are my favourite. When Eva had finally come off intubation she was on CPAP, continuous positive airway pressure. It meant she had a rather large mask over the her which pump oxygen in so she didn’t have to work as hard to keep her oxygen levels up.
The mask looked uncomfortable and left a little indent on her forehead where it rested. But Eva didn’t seem to mind too much, in fact she took this opporutunity to learn about to blow rasberries. She would lie for what seemed like hours, just blowing away. The nurses and I laughed as kept it up all day long.
It was when I knew she was getting better. She was Eva again, not the unresponsive baby on the life support, or the frightened crying baby she had been in the ER, struggling to breath. She was Eva, and she had enough energy and life in her to blow raspberries through her CPAP mask.